My night with the animated nominees
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Any moron can talk about the merits of the Academy Award for Best Animated Short, or whine about the seemingly random quality bar by which we select nominees. So rather than air the issue of who won what award, I think we ought to dwell instead upon who wore what and who attended which parties. Because, isn’t that the point of this wonderful, magical night?
Let’s hear it for Kaspar (The Danish Poet) with his neckerchief and beret. It takes some real moxie to carry off that look, Danish or no. Someone should tell The Little Match girl that the Waif Look went out of fashion too long ago to try to stage a comeback. Not fashionable at all, I’m afraid. Maestro was looking quite smart in his simple black and white tux, but then simplicity is always best. No tarting it up with red vest or dressing it down with jeans for our wooden bird. He’s class all the way.
At high profile gatherings such as this, nudity in the name of a protest has always been an attention getter, and this year was no different. Scrat (No Time for Nuts) showed up in the altogether in his bid to point up the naked terror of mankind on the brink of extinction due to Global Warming, something he knows a bit about. And the alien from Lifted is voicing his support for illegal alien equal rights legislation by showing up au naturel. At least we didn’t have Wallace (Wallace and Gromit) showing up sans-coulottes like we used to every year Aardman was nominated.
But of course the After Parties were the real event, and I was fortunate as a member of the press to be invited to the most exclusive. We partied until dawn, the animated characters and I. I’m more than a little proud to tell you I drank the alien right under the table, but then, he really can’t hold his liquor, can he? I’m not even sure he’s legal, to tell you the truth.
Like all good things, it eventually had to come to an end, and in the warm splash of a Hollywood sunrise, we all hugged and said our goodbyes. With heads full of fond memories and arms weighed down with trinkets - there’s nothing quite like expensive gift bags showering down on the already rich to let you know that this was truly a Wonderful, Magical night - we set off back to our Regular Lives, knowing we would probably never be together in the same way ever again.
Now, if only I can remember where I left my pants.